Some people just don’t know when to say dead; Kerry Katona, Margaret Thatcher, Jesus, and generally the “spectacular comebacks” tend to not be that impressive. But instead seem to be a somewhat successful attempt at clawing in money for artists who’ve gone off the boil. Michael Jackson for instance. 

Nevertheless they are entertaining, even if you get to see how they’ve been in the ten year interval. Who wasn’t shocked when they saw Claire Richards and she looked more like Christina Hendricks than Christina Milian? Everyone was. 

So the new series of The Great Steps Revival 2012 is well worth a cheeky peak if you want to remember how sometimes truly awful Steps were. Here’s five reasons why:

  1. Claire from Steps, otherwise known as Claire Richards, is fat. She’s fine with it, but she’s not fine with everyone obsessing about it. To be honest, people are only bothered about her weight gain because it makes her the most interesting member of a group who’s members include Lisa Scott-Lee; a woman so universally dull that even giving them a double barrelled surname doesn’t make them interesting. And, surely if the Daily Mail is only saying that you are “pouring your curves into” something then consider yourself lucky. You could be Katherine Jenkins. They really hate her.
  2. Advertising Steps: The Great Collection during the program showing us their dramatic comeback is a bit heavy handed, and a little presumptuous. It’s like spoiling the end of the story before the end. Like during the bad series of Buffy where Dawn was shoehorned in and they revealed that Buffy died in the ad breaks before the series finale ended. What’s that you’re saying? This is just a huge capitalist ploy to tart up an otherwise uneventful comeback tour? Well, aren’t you all just cynics?
  3. Lisa Scott-Lee’s teeth haven’t really improved since the Stomp braceface era. Shame.
  4. During the Steps era of pop history Ian Watkins was known as ‘H’. When asked about what this meant he would beam and say the words ‘hyperactive,’ when in fact we all knew it meant ‘homosexual.’ His sexuality is one of the greatest obvious secret in the World of pop, coming a little after Paloma Faith being totally batshit crazy. Now ten years on, Watkins is as repentant as he was during the original Steps documentary. The little shit. 
  5. This is an obligatory mention of Lee Latchford Evans.

There. Claire from Steps is still the best one.